LHaus
Oct 25 2011

Is Long Island City going to the dogs?

Henry contemplates his new playground in LIC. – Photo by Benjamin Peryer

The answer is yes. Well at least some of LIC is definitively going to the dogs. The new and improved Vernon Blvd dog run has been officially opened for a couple of weeks now, with a few renovations still in the works.

While dog owners in Hunters Point area rejoice, others are not so excited. Case in point is an interesting piece of graffiti discovered on a LIC sidewalk, to which liQcity contributor Steve Hofstetter has an equally interesting response:

A message on the sidewalk in Hunters Point, Long Island City

Curb Your Attitude
By Steve Hofstetter

The graffiti on the sidewalk reads “Dog owners are ruining LIC.” Because sweeping generalizations, divisiveness, and graffiti are clearly positive forces, I’m surprised it wasn’t smeared when the writer tripped over their own irony.

Painting every dog owner as a negative influence is irresponsible; the vast majority of dog owners are people who just enjoy caring for a living being that loves them unconditionally. Having a dog is like having a kid who never grows up to hate you.

I didn’t like dogs for the first 31 years of my life. But I fell in love with a dog person, and she educated me to understand that there aren’t bad dogs, just bad owners. It makes sense – every time a little kid shrieks on an airplane and his parents do nothing, it’s not the kid that I want to strangle with a seatbelt extension.

Since I wasn’t a dog owner until recently, I can see the issue from both sides. Some dog owners are over enthusiastic, treating their dogs like they’re more important than any human being. Some dog owners are under enthusiastic, not policing their dogs’ bad behavior. But is that enough to “ruin LIC”? I doubt it – since my dog is actually the reason I love it here so much.

The new Vernon Blv dog run, Long Island City. – Photo by Jesse Winter

My time in LIC was supposed to have an expiration date. My wife and I moved here to save up for a bigger place in Manhattan, since most Manhattan realtors define a two-bedroom apartment as what is in reality a studio with a bathroom. (A three-bedroom is a studio with a bathroom that has a tub.)

For the first six months we lived here, we were focused on leaving. We didn’t meet any neighbors, we ate most meals in Manhattan, and we kept to ourselves like we had nuclear launch codes. For six months, we didn’t live in Long Island City – we just slept here.

Things suddenly changed when we adopted our dog, an adorable Beagle/Dachshund mix we re-named Bea Arthur.

Because we needed to walk Bea, we met our neighbors. Because we had to be home to train Bea out of separation anxiety, we discovered LIC’s restaurants. Because we wanted some outdoor space for Bea, we moved from a high rise at the distant northwest corner of the neighborhood to a brownstone in the heart of Vernon. I love my dog, but I love her even more because she gave me Long Island City. She loves Long Island City, too – I know that because she’s comfortable pooping all over it.

Maybe poop is the problem. Irresponsible, selfish people who aren’t conscientious about cleaning up after their dogs can ruin things for everyone. But irresponsible, selfish people are the reason there’s often food garbage on the Vernon Mall and why that yellow hummer is STILL parked in two spots in the Rockrose garage. If you judge an entire group by its weakest members, then every one of us is “ruining LIC” in some capacity. Saying “dog owners are ruining LIC” is based in as much fact as saying “people who cut their sandwiches in triangles are ruining LIC.”

This is the sixteenth neighborhood I’ve lived in, but thanks to Bea Arthur, it’s the first one that I actually feel a part of. Having a dog showed me that Long Island City is a wonderful place with a healthy diversity that doesn’t often exist outside of a college brochure. Even if I wasn’t a dog owner, I would hate to see them removed from that diversity. And not just because dog owners also own more than half of the neighborhood retail.

If you still think “dog owners are ruining LIC,” picture a grown man yelling “Bea Arthur, stop sniffing that dog’s butt!” If that doesn’t make you crack a smile, nothing will.


Steve Hofstetter is an internationally touring comedian who has been on The Late Late Show and had the #1 comedy album in the world. He is a proud resident of Long Island City.


The views expressed in this article do not reflect the views of liQcity.com.

49 Comments

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80% of dog owners are fine.

The problem is the 20%. Dog owners ignoring “dog free” zones, not curbing their dogs and having them off the leash ruin it for everyone.

Please value other people above your dogs.

#1 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

But that’s the thing #1, those 20% don’t value other people. That’s why I have to do slalom with the sh*t left on the sidewalk. Sometimes on VERNON BLVD. If you see someone not picking up their dog’s gift to the universe, please get Larry David on them and call them out.

#2 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Why are there dog free zones in the first place? I don’t understand that. Humans leave way more trash than the occasional dog owner who doesn’t pick up after their dog.

#3 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#1: you can use that stat for just about any situation. there is always a minority that goes against the grain and often spoils things for others. that is life. but that is also why we base our opinions on the behavior of the majority. majority of dog owners follow the rules – bottom line. enough with the complaining. people seem to have nothing of substance to discuss, except trivial matters of where dogs poop. there are rapes happening all over the borough at the moment – how come you’re not lamenting over the 20% of men that engage in sexual assaults. no, you’re upset and busy complaining over dog owners. the subways are cutting service, there is massive construction taking place in LIC that is dragging on for years, budgets are being slashed, corporations are getting MORE greedy, politicians are stealing money…expend your energies on real issues facing the communities – plently of 20% buckets to choose from there.

#4 rita / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Yes, its the few owners that are the exception to the rule (and there’s no way its as high as 80/20). That’s what makes this graffiti so stupid. If you are angry at the few irresponsible dog owners, the people you most want on your side are those of us who are responsible.

If you saw two white guys littering, would you be willing to say “White guys are ruining LIC?” Or just “those two guys are jerks”?

#5 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I’m with Rita.

#6 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Yes #4 there are other issues to discuss, but we are discussing this one. It’s not about dog owners, but about consideration for other humans in general. Whether it’s sexual assaults, the MTA, or dog owners that don’t pick up their dog’s shit. It’s not a trivial issue. Dog feces spread disease and kids come dangerously in contact with it, not to mention other dogs as well. It’s a legitimate issue just like all the others. If liqcity covered sexual assaults and the MTA (which it does sometimes) trust me I get just as upset. I do not think men should be assaulting women, or corporations getting more bailouts, or politicians being allowed to steal. I do also NOT want to step in dog shit on my way to work. That’s all.

#7 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I thought it was pretty ironic that the day the graffiti showed up, the two NYC garbage cans at the same intersection disappeared. If the dog-hater’s problem was with dog poop, then he effectively made it more difficult for dog-owners to clean up after their pets.
CHALK OWNERS ARE RUINING L.I.C.

#8 Pete / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I’m with #3. The amount of litter in the neighborhood is out of hand. I’m guessing those that are blind enough to step in dog poo aren’t seeing the more obvious sanitary issue – LIC needs trash cans on every street corner and a more aggressive street cleaning schedule.

#9 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Here here #9. I am amazed by how much garbage gets thrown in the street here. A few corner cans would go a long way towards solving that problem.

#10 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

LIC smells like dog pee after it rains. No one cleans up after their dog pee, yet is is a crime for a person to pee in the street. And, then, there is the 5% who don’t clean up their dog’s poop. It isn’t as bad as the upper east side but we are getting there. I suppose there wouldnt be a problem if there were toilets for dogs in their owners’ homes.

Also, the dog owners who are inconsiderate (which is a small percentage) react very aggressively to polite reminders of the rules (pick up after your dog, no dogs on playfields, etc.).

Let’s face it. This comes down to each battling for his own best interest and little regard for the common good.

#11 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

How does one clean up dog pee?

#12 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Do the streets get cleaned in LIC? That’s not a joke, I’m serious. I’ve never seen a street cleaner.

Also, has anyone noticed that Vernon Blvd outside of the Dunkin’ Donuts smells awful all of the sudden? That’s not a knock on DD, just a fact that the area smells awful. Yesterday there was a liquid in the curb, not sure what, but it was milky in color.

#13 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Allowing your dog to crap and not cleaning it up is a symptom of a neighborhood where selfish people don’t feel bonds with one another or care about their community. If you knew the person who was going to step in your dog’s crap or the business owner whose property you defiled, you wouldn’t do it.

I actually witnessed two well-dressed guys walk their dog to a spot on a neighbor’s property where the guy put out a sign that said “No Dog Peeing” and allowed their dog to piss there. What does that say about the two guys? That they are just “irresponsible” ? Or that they are complete dickheads who don’t care about their neighbors and the place they live in?

#14 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Exactly #12! How does one clean up dog pee? You can’t. Which is why it should be illegal for dogs to pee all over NYC. Seriously. Why can’t men pee all over the city? Because it’s disgusting right? Dogs should not be allowed to either. Makes perfect sense. Humans before animals. Dogs should be banned from NYC because they create a stinking foul mess in the city. You guys should be forced to get pee pads and keep them in your house and let your dogs pee and poop on them only. Why not? That’s what cat owners do.

#15 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Actually #13, Dunkin Donuts is definitely contributing to the mess in the streets. I see DD branded trash everywhere now.

#16 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I think there are some fair points brought up here, but attacking dog owners is not going to accomplish anything. I’m not a dog owner, but I do see that it’s a community of people and that most of them do pick up after their animals. I think it would be good to ask them to do things like police others into respecting other people’s property and maybe doing a regular monthly dog poop clean up effort. They are never going to ban dogs from NYC so we have to figure out a way to live together. I see that people’s pets keep them sane and in some cases even turn people into bearable human beings, so I’m not against it. I,too, would like to see less dog poop on the sidewalks though, and maybe people respecting owners’ properties more. Thank you.

#17 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

This was bound to get ugly. I’m a dog-owner and I hereby apologize for my fellow dog owners who don’t pick up after their dogs. That is absolutely wrong and if I see someone walking away from their dog’s feces I have actually chased them down and given them a baggie. (I carry them on my dog’s leash.) So please know that some of us are doing our part.

#18 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I thought this was a well-written well-measured response. I would have been a lot more hot-tempered if I saw graffiti like that – good job Steve!

#19 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#13 Have you ever walked past SweetLeaf? They leave their leaking garbage bags leaning against the outside of their store pretty much all the time. Between that and the cigarette butts all over that corner from the Creek on one side and the bus-stop on the other it’s pretty disgusting.

#16 just because DD trash is branded we can recognize where it has been bought. It would be interesting to see who contributes what to the garbage levels on the streets if SweetLeaf, Communitea, Cranky’s, etc., started serving their take-out fare in branded bags/cups.

#20 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#12 – you pick up the Dunkin Donuts cup politely left on the street by #15 and train your dog to pee in it.

#21 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I’m #15 and I don’t litter. I throw my garbage in the trash cans. I don’t know why the city is removing trash cans in a neighborhood where the number of people (and dogs) are increasing. It makes no sense. I think half of the problem is the city.

#22 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I am dismayed to learn that the fartcar is still there!

#23 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Hello All,
First, I would like to say that most Dog owners in LIC respect their community and their neighbors. Most of them also HATE seeing dog poop left behind on the side walk. I (a dog owner) am proud of LIC for having so many dogs and not so much poop and it’s because of community organizations like DOG LIC that help police dog owners and help the dog community stay on track! I for one, pick up random dog poop because I don’t want to see this type of negativity from people about dogs and their owners. I can not pick up every single poop left behind but I try. We should not fight about babies or dogs or trash etc. We ALL have one goal right? We ALL want a safe and clean community right? Instead of making war with each other, why don’t we WORK TOGETHER to achieve this goal? Fighting will only make people lash out and tag things or leave poop or whatever it is people are angry about more…

#24 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Rah rah #24!

#25 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

FYI: New York’s “nuisance law” says your dog-cat-animal can’t “commit a nuisance on a sidewalk of any public place, on a floor, wall, stairway or roof of any public or private premises used in common by the public, or on a fence, wall or stairway of a building abutting on a public place.”

On a side note, I’m going to enjoy referring to my dog’s business as committing a nuisance. :)

#26 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Thank you Steve for writing such a nice article. It really is a joy to have a pet and I’m sad that this disturbs others. I will make an effort to pick up other dog poop I see left behind as a service for being able to have my dog. If other dog owners could do this too, I think that would help a lot. It’s sad to think that people look at my dog and resent us because a few others don’t show respect. Please if you have a dog don’t let him pee where it’s not allowed, and please please please pick up your dog poop. If you can’t do that, then I do agree maybe you should not have a dog. Having a dog in the city is a huge privilege and also a responsibility.

#27 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Thank you, Steve! We will see you at tonight’s community board meeting. We’re in support!

#28 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

It is great to see so many positive comments with offers to help clean up the neighborhood from dog owners and non-dog owners alike. Constructive efforts like the litter cleanup DOG LIC organizes each year help a whole lot more than divisive graffiti.

For those of you who want your voice heard on this or other issues, there are ways to get involved. The community board meets the first Thursday of each month. And tonight at 6PM, there is a public community meeting at St. Mary’s on 49th and Vernon to discuss the proposed parking changes on 48th as well as 5 new liquor licenses (including the new comedy club, where I’m part owner).

I hope to see many of you there.

#29 Steve Hofstetter / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Who are these people who toss their empty coffee cups and paper bags on the sidewalk? I just don’t get it. How does someone devolve into being such a pig? I’ve lived in NYC my entire life and have never, EVER just thrown trash on the street, whether there were trash cans or not.

And if my parents were to have seen me do it, I’m sure I would have gotten a smack in the head (I’m not excusing violence against children, but there you have it). What is so difficult about hanging onto your DD bag or cup of pee until you can toss it away?

Maybe if we instituted a policy that litterers and dog poopers received a sharp kick in the ass by any witness, we can finally nip this problem in the bud.

#30 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

How about instead of violence there is a poop fee.

#31 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Oh my god #15 were you seriously hit with the stupid stick or I don’t understand policy stick? 30pound+ dogs cannot go on weewee pads. Since, it is clear you don’t know own a pet, maybe you should not be commenting on the subject.

Orwell said it best “4 legs good…2 legs baaaaaaaad”

#32 Lola / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Let me defend #15 ( I am not #15). Your response shows exactly how inconsiderate people can be. There is no reason to insult someone (“stupid stick”). I agree with #15 that dogs, like people, should do there business inside. How they do it, would be up to the owner.

By the way, did you know that a dog has the same carbon footprint as an SUV?

#33 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I’m just annoyed at all the gravel all over the sidewalk in front of the park. A hazard in high heels!

#34 N / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Then #32 maybe 30+lb dogs should not be allowed to be in nyc since they can’t pee inside. Why will no dog owner answer this question: Why is it ok for dogs to pee all over everything but not people? We find it disgusting when a man pees on the sidewalk, but not a dog?? I don’t understand this logic. Can some dog owner please tell me why I should not find it disgusting and unsanitary that dogs are allowed to urinate all over the curbs, sidewalks, stairs, sides of building, plants, trees, car tires etc in the city? But I will get arrested or get a fine if I do that. Basically the dog has more rights than I do.

#35 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#35, OMG, I like totally agree. Know what else annoys me? CARS occupying the streets when I’m trying to cross them. I was even late for work this morning because I couldn’t cross the street because of all the cars passing by! Why can’t the rest of the world walk and take the subway like I do? When I see my neighbors find happiness in something that inconveniences me, I get angry.

I’m so glad you and I see eye to eye!

#36 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#36 for the win.

#37 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

I am not #35. #36 this is a very poo analogy. You can love dogs but not want their pee and poop on the streets.

#38 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Yes, it is a very poo analogy.

#39 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

#38 – Oh I love cars too! I just don’t like it when people drive them in the streets. Seriously people, park them in a parking garage and drive up and down the ramps so you don’t get in my way.

Oh, and I’m totally not #36 either. Really. Seriously. Not me, nope.

#40 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Let me cut and paste from my previous post: ….
We ALL want a safe and clean community right? Instead of making war with each other, why don’t we WORK TOGETHER to achieve this goal? Fighting will only make people lash out and tag things or leave poop or whatever it is people are angry about…

#41 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Woof woof!

#42 "Sparky" / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

“How about instead of violence there is a poop fee.” #31

There is a poop fee in NYC, it’s from the Pooper Scooper law of 1978:
CURB YOUR DOG, $250 FINE.

#43 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

L.IC. is great… for me to POOP ON!

#44 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Where is Larry David when we need him?

#45 Anonymous / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

Did anyone notice a follow-up graffiti that said something along the lines of “REMIND them we live here too”? I’m not a fan of this chalk artist but he/she does have a point when it comes to pee. Some people, although as nice as they are, actually do have to be reminded. Our pups have their needs but we can train them to hold until we approach a reasonable spot, and this especially doesn’t include building facades and building entrances. Every time my dog exits the building she immediately pulls to the curb to do her business but I always drag her off the sidewalk to a less crowded corner and only then do I give her the command. The last thing I want is for pee to be the first thing my neighbors smell when they enter or leave the building. We can’t eliminate the stench but we can stop concentrating it in the most inappropriate places.

#46 abc / 6 months, 3 weeks ago

you can pee all over the sidewalk no problem. you just have to do it in your pants! no one will bug you–and since 1976 only tourists will look at you funny.

it’s really the taking of the man-piece out in public that’s the real nuisance.

#47 peewee / 6 months, 2 weeks ago

a few weeks ago there was another one of these chalk writings on the wall of the 48th avenue park… every community has this argument and i see it like this, in any neighborhood there are two categories responsible residents and irresponsible residents, and there are pet owners and non pet owners in both categories, just as there are families, couples, singles, party goers etc… if the condition of the neighborhood is unfavorable its more than a dog issue, its an issue of who we share this community with and why are they not respecting it, i feel like people like to use dogs as a scapegoat because it is the easiest think to point a finger at.
I have seen disgusting behaviors from residents to which a dog was not involved but why aren’t those pressing issues? such as, drunks outside of SHI breaking bottles, grown men in those party buses getting off and peeing on the little trees in gantry park… people having sex in the park area of ps 78, and even once a couple was having sex on the side of my building right on center blvd, used condoms thrown in the park, drunk people passed out on the benches, water balloons, food and rocks thrown from balconies and roof decks… and I had seen all these things while walking my dogs but don’t worry I picked up their poop!

#48 carolena / 6 months, 2 weeks ago

Yes, LIC has gone to the dogs. Of the development kind. It has turned a middle class neighborhood of hard working family oriented people into a transient, upper middle class neighborhood with barely the ammenities that Manhattan has but higher prices: most tenants 20 year old frats with no consideration for their fellow man sharing apartments and then getting kicked out when the LL raises their rent $400 more a month, or trust fund babies living off of mommy and daddy. It has made landlords of railroad apartments lose their minds by trying to charge 5 times what the apartments are worth. Noone seems to care about neighborhood anymore. they only care about money.

And everyone has a right to it. But what about the good tenant who has lived here for 15 years and made this their home?

What about the new tenant who is trying to make it a home but can’t becuase their is no more rent stabilization in this area, let alone this city.

I’m sorry, but $2000 for a railroad or a studio is a sin. There is NO reason for this. Most of these walk ups are already paid for and the capital improvements pay for themselves within a month becasue most of it is Home Depot style crap.
Yet there are people who, somehow, can afford it and will pay for it only becuase the Times has called it a cool area.

This is my neighborhood and I don’t like what has happened.

#49 Debbi V. / 4 months, 3 weeks ago

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